My Consult Questions

I thought it might be helpful to include consult/negotiation questions I ask in my writings section.

1. What kind of session/scene are you looking for? (Please be as specific as possible) what is the fantasy you’ve been thinking of?
2. What are your limits? Are they all hard limits, or do you have soft limits you like pushed a bit?
3. What are acceptable punishments and funishments? They should not be something that crosses a boundary ever for the record. For example, say you dislike canes a bit, but they aren't a limit, that is something that makes good punishment, as opposed to a funishment, for example say you really love bare handed over the knee spanking, and maybe playfully act up for fun, then bare handed over the knee spanking would be an excellent “funishment”
4. I use a stoplight safeword system, red meaning break scene and stop everything, yellow meaning something needs to be adjusted in scene but you don't want to stop, green for when yellow has been addressed, however if you go nonverbal in subspace I want to have alternative gestures. Do you go nonverbal in subspace? Is there anything you have found works for you? I have a few methods I like depending on what kind of play we are doing. If tied up and gagged I like to put a tennis ball or bell in hand that can be dropped as a safeword, three taps in a row is another I like to use if its accessible at the time, a peace sign gesture, or any three sounds in a row are others I use.
5. What medications do you take?
6. Any physical health or mental health conditions? Anything that triggers either of these? Do you have things on hand for your medical needs? If so please being them. (Examples: an epipen, diabetic supplies like a glucose monitor, or food/glucose tablets, seizure meds, etc)
   you will be asked to stay hydrated as well, this is extremely important during play in the arid climate of Arizona.
7. Any physical limitations? If so what accommodations do you find help you? Would you like me to help find accommodations and accessibility options for you?
8. Please list any and ALL allergies. Example: latex or nut allergies

(Please Answer honestly, I am skilled in adaptive play and ask these questions to ensure safe, sane and consensual play. I am very creative with working accommodation and accessibility in and it will not take away from your experience.)

9. How do you like to end the scene? What does this look like for you?
10. Do you require aftercare? If so do you have an after care kit? Do you have an aftercare plan? What things help you for aftercare? I believe aftercare is very important and am happy to provide aftercare.
11. If there is anything else you would like to tell me, please do, the title of Dom comes with great power, and therefore great responsibility. I do not take that lightly and one of the most important things a Dom can do is listen.

This is why negotiating play is so imperative. I expect only one thing from a sub aside from respect, and that's communication… well and good hygiene and staying hydrated but these are kind of a given lol.

It is my personal philosophy that submission is a gift, a Dom only has power because a submissive gives it to them and can take it away if the Dom violates boundaries. Consent is paramount. A good Dom knows this and takes care of a submissive. So during consult and negotiation of play we are on equal footing. Any power dynamics can be implemented after we have discussed as equals what should and should not transpire.

Thank you so much to Overlord_Merlot for this. I could not have said any of it better Myself.